First A Kitty…Then A Beast…Now A…

So I read my kitty book…then I read a Beast book…a version of Beauty And The Beast…and now I am reading this new Jane Ann Krentz book…which I can’t put down…so far…I seem to say that a lot…don’t I?  The can’t put down part…but why would anyone want to read a book that they could put down?   Not this girl…

So I have been thinking a lot about family this week…my adventurous sister and her husband are at a dude ranch in New Mexico just a few weeks after we had a fun week here…my brother and his wife are trying to stay strong during a family loss and I am here just trying to stay healthy and feel ok.  It’s funny the way family issues either bring you closer or tear you apart.  Den’s brother’s wife will text me daily…just to see how I am…I don’t need her to do that but the fact that she does it warms my soul.  She is the one who taught me it’s ok to read a whole bunch of books at a time.  She loves the library and we talk books constantly.

My brother’s wife’s baby brother died this week.  I might have met him once or twice…at their wedding for sure.  He was 54 years old.  He loved sports.  He was about to get married when they discovered an advanced cancer.  His parents are in their 90’s and preparing to bury their youngest child.  I thought about him last night…a good old Milwaukee boy…beer, brauts and the Packers on Sunday.  NorthPoint Frozen Custard?  Leon’s?  Cheese Curds?  Friday Fish Fries?  Old Milwaukee neighborhoods?  I really didn’t know him but what I have learned about him has affected me deeply during the last few months.  I need to cherish every minute that my family is intact…every single chemo ache or pain is to be held onto and remembered because it’s keeping me alive…literally.  My brother went through cancer treatment last summer.  It was devastating but he came out of it strong…when he talks to me…when I seek him out…I listen to everything he says because he’s lived this and he knows.   He knows what it’s like to be haunted at night…to think about what used to be…to not be able to go back to BC…before cancer…sigh!  And his wife?  OMG…her capacity for caring for all of us is immeasurable…her strength in caring for my brother and then hers as well as aging parents…I don’t even have words.

I have a check up today…just to see how things are working.  Did you know that there is such a thing as chemo brain?  You just can’t explain it!


21 thoughts on “First A Kitty…Then A Beast…Now A…

  1. Laurel-Rain Snow says:

    I like that you cherish your family connections. No matter what is happening in our lives, reaching out to loved ones gives us strength.

    Sorry about your brother’s wife’s baby brother. What we realize is how each day is a gift. I lost my oldest brother when he was 43…many years ago. He would have been 79 now if he had lived. But the memory of him lives on.

    My #2 son just turned 50…how is that possible? His fiance gave him a big surprise party. I’ll be spotlighting some of the photos later. They just moved into their “new” home a couple of weeks ago. He will rent out his condo. I have enjoyed visiting at each of his various homes, and I miss the cabin he used to have at Big Bear. We move on from home to home, but remember each.

    I’m rambling.

    Enjoy your week…hope the appointment goes well.


  2. Carol Evans says:

    I haven’t read anything by Jayne Anne Krentz for ages
    I’m so sorry about your brother’s wife’s brother. I’m guilty of taking family for granted. Our immediate family is close, but beyond that I need to do a better job of staying in touch. I should send David’s aunt a note today.


    • Patty Magyar says:

      I was the same way, Carol…but I try not to be so self possessed any more…I don’t mean that you are…you aren’t at all but I was so happy with my own little world…probably too happy.


  3. Denise Pagano Ward says:

    I’m glad you mentioned your doctor’s appointment, because I was literally reaching for the phone BEFORE your post showed up in my feed. I am sending all good vibes that your meeting with the doc goes well. I know the kitties will inspect you when you get home.

    Family is wonderful.

    Love you much. Feel good. Jane Krentz. Will need to read one of hers again.


  4. Kathryn says:

    Family certainly is a big blessing, especially when it works together like yours does. Shared joys but shared challenges too bring you so close together. I have found that with our family especially through the tough times of the last few years. Reading about your family is inspirational. All the best for the doctor’s visit.


  5. Ti says:

    Chemo brain is probably largely due to exhaustion. Don’t ya think? It takes such a toll but of course it has to be that way to kill the bad cells.

    I never really had an extended family so whenever you talk about your family I am always a tad envious but in a good way.


  6. BermudaOnion says:

    Yes, tough times either tear you apart or make you stronger. I’m glad yours are making you stronger. I’m so sad to hear about your sister-in-law’s brother, though. I remember when my mother-in-law had chemo brain. Luckily, she was able to laugh about it – of course, she was able to laugh about just about anything. She was so much fun.


  7. DEZZY says:

    there is nothing sadder than a parent losing a child, especially in years when you expect to go first…. I’ve never had a real family, so I can only imagine that pain….
    Speaking of books, I’m currently translating AV. Geiger’s Tell Me No Lies for the readers in my country. The biggest book fair in this part of Europe starts in Belgrade next week, so I’m preparing for that one and hoping my editors will bring me some nice new books from Frankfurt Book Fair which is currently being held in Germany as the biggest one in the world 🙂


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